luigivanpeebles:

rabioheab:

instead of sending me nudes, send me photos of you wearing so many layers of clothes that you can’t even move 

mikerickson:

i didn’t know it was possible to trust someone this much

nipplebutt:

*punches hole through casket* i forgot to clear my history

catholicnun:

i don’t like hannah montanna’s new song

mmmcookies22:

punziepond:

kittykittydontpanic:

bougiegal:

just a reminder than tumblr gets face characters fired and if you keep going in this direction with the new Peter Pan face character you are all so suddenly obsessed with you’re going to make him lose his job

can you explain how that happens? 

people find out his real name and call him that at the park, therefore taking him out of character and ruining the magic for the younger kids

SIGNAL BOOSTING THIS SHIT

mitten:

sex is so weird like hey let me stick my rock hard limb into ur tiny hole and then slam into you repeatedly because i love you

jwisser:

thepasta-nerada:

vvrathia:

the sexual tension when u and ur crush are online on fb at the same time and u just stare at their lil green dot

and suddenly you know what gatsby felt like

This is actually the most profound and appropriate literary allusion I’ve encountered so far this week.

vagisodium:

pornolympics:

2 inces shorter and i could legally be a midget.  ok

are you telling me that you’ve been illegally a midget this whole time. call the cops

newsiesforever-secondtonone:

Okay so today in Chemistry this kid Roman was walking across the room to get something and he tripped and this one girl immediately shouts “THE EMPIRE HAS FALLEN” and i cried